When I Hit Rock Bottom — And What Pulled Me Back

 

When I first started freelancing, I had so much hope. I imagined landing projects, building a career, and finally having the freedom to work on my own terms. But the reality was far harder than I expected. Day after day, I sent out proposals and heard nothing back. No projects. No clients. No wins.

Each day of not finding work chipped away at my self-worth. Slowly, my hope started fading. I fell into a depression I didn’t talk about with anyone. Pride kept me quiet. I didn’t want people to see me struggling or to think I had failed.

It got to a point where I stopped sending proposals altogether. Instead, I’d spend days just watching TV. I stopped cleaning the house. I stopped cooking and would just order takeout. I felt stuck—like I had reached a dead end before my freelancing journey even really began.

Then one day, a friend messaged me out of the blue. He told me he had enrolled in a class and was learning so many new things. That message struck a chord. It made me realize that maybe what I needed wasn’t just more luck or more time—it was more knowledge and skills.

That same friend eventually became my first mentor in freelancing. We’re not that close anymore, and I’ve heard people say unkind things about him, but in my heart, I don’t believe he’s bad. Sometimes circumstances push people into choices others don’t understand. But regardless of what others say, I’m still deeply grateful to him—because he helped me change my life at a time when I was at my lowest.

That period taught me something I’ll never forget: life has highs and lows, and during the low moments, learning can be the lifeline that keeps you moving forward.

Whenever I feel lost or unsure of what to do next, I go back to that lesson. Studying, learning, and growing—these are the things that help me rebuild my confidence and find my way again.

Because sometimes, the way out of the dark isn’t a giant leap. It’s a small step toward knowledge. And that step can lead you back to hope.