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The Lessons I Am Learning At 50 From The Top Five Regrets Of The Dying

By sherlane

Today, while scrolling through my feed, I came across a video about The Top Five Regrets of the Dying by Bronnie Ware. I have seen this list before but for some reason, seeing it today felt different. Maybe it is because I am now fifty and life looks and feels more real. I know that time moves in one direction and I am not getting any younger. I know that one day I will also leave this world and the thought stayed with me longer than expected.

There are still so many things I have not done. So many dreams I postponed. So many moments I let pass because I was busy or afraid or unsure. That is why the video resonated with me. It felt like someone gently tapping my shoulder reminding me that I still have time to choose differently.

Here are the five regrets Bronnie Ware heard in her years as a palliative care nurse. As I reflect on them, I realize they are not just regrets from people at the end of life. They are guidance for those of us still living.

I wish I had lived a life true to myself and not the life others expected of me

This one hit me the hardest. I lived many years trying to make people happy and trying to meet expectations that were never really mine. When I think about the times I ignored my own dreams because I did not want to disappoint others, I feel a quiet sadness.

But I also feel hope because I can still choose to live a life that is truly mine. I can take small steps daily toward the things that reflect who I am and who I want to become.

I wish I had not worked so hard

There were seasons in my life when work consumed everything. I would look back and realize I lost time that could have been spent with family or friends or simply enjoying the quiet beauty of ordinary days.

Now, at fifty, I understand balance in a deeper way. I want to work but I also want to live. I want to protect my energy and give myself permission to rest without guilt.

I wish I had the courage to express my feelings

This regret feels very familiar. There were moments when I wanted to say how I felt but chose silence because I did not want to create conflict or be misunderstood. I kept so many things inside thinking I was protecting myself when in reality I was only creating distance.

I want to learn to express my feelings with clarity and calmness. I want to say I love you more. I want to say I am hurt when I am hurt. I want to show people the real me instead of hiding behind fear.

I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends

Life moves fast. People come and go. We get busy and we think there will always be time to reconnect. But the truth is friendships need effort. They need presence.

There are people I truly miss. People who brought warmth and light to my life. I want to rebuild those connections. I want to reach out and say I thought of you today and I hope you are well.

I wish I had allowed myself to be happier

This one feels simple but powerful. Happiness is a choice and sometimes I forget that. Sometimes I hold back joy because I am too worried about what others will think or because I feel guilty enjoying life while carrying other responsibilities.

I am learning that happiness does not need permission. I am learning to smile more. To enjoy the small things. To welcome joy without hesitation. To choose happiness every day, not someday.

Where I Go From Here

As I enter this chapter of my life, I want to be more intentional. I want to live in a way that my future self will look back and feel grateful, not regretful. I want to make decisions that honor my heart. I want to nurture the relationships that matter. I want to express myself honestly. I want to create memories that feel warm and meaningful.

Seeing that video today reminded me that I still have time. Not to do everything but to do what truly matters. I still have time to become the person I want to be.

Life is short but it is also beautiful and full of possibility. And at fifty, I am choosing to live it with more courage, more honesty and more joy.

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